Getting Ready

Espen was entirely certain he was not nervous. So he'd been out drinking after completing the traditional hunt for a stag the day before. He'd wanted to celebrate with his friends and comrades. That was normal. Even the fact that he had drank rather heavily was normal. But...

Okay, he was nervous. It was a lot of responsibility to have even a small say in clan's future, especially when he sometimes conveniently forgot his had his own children's futures to look out for. Perhaps that wasn't something a father should ever do, but Espen had never really planned to be a father once, let alone twice. He was trying though with Lise more than he had with Jesper. At some point, he might try making more amends with his son but the boy had a much better father figure as it was and Espen didn't want to over parent the young man.

Drunk as he was, he'd had some help getting home last night and into bed, but not any help getting out of his clothes. Regardless, he slept like a log; hard, loud, and dead to the world.

As a carpenter, Espen had rather quickly improved his tent to a more permanent, if a bit crude hut, though parts of it were still a work in progress. It had two rooms, a bedroom in the back separated by a curtain(that used to be part of his tent) and a front room where Lise slept that was also a sort of living and storage space, with a small central fire pit for heating. The exterior was dark wood with mud for insulation and the roof slanted steeply, covered in heavy thatch. The floor was lined with woven rugs and furs and beyond the glow of embers in the fire, nearly pitch black.

At least until someone decided to welcome in the morning sunlight.

He groaned and rolled over out of the sunlight, tangled in furs and blankets on the cot. Espen pulled a pillow over his head. "That's...not typical slave behavior, woman," he grumbled, half still asleep, partly hungover, mostly joking. "Mnot hiding, mhungover," he explained helpfully.

She wasn't wrong...but Espen had a hard time imagining any other slaves barging into their master's rooms and demanding they get up while all at once accusing them of being a drunk. It was more than a little brash.

He mumbled incoherently, some smart snarky comment lost to a headache and muddled thoughts and sleep. He relented a little as she pulled away the pillow and took a sharp breath at the removal of the blankets. She did realize it was cold right? Not the dead of winter, certainly, but cold all the same.

"It is. Later," he grumbled, reaching up to take her hand as she brush his hair away. It was always a bit...confusing when Eira touched him and when he touched her. He knew she felt comfortable with him and he did with her, but...he'd found recently he wanted to be more than comfortable. He might own her, but she was so much more than his property. She was a companion, a friend, a caretaker for his daughter, and...Espen wasn't sure what else. They had kissed but...well, that hardly meant anything, even if his body thought otherwise.

He wanted to pull her down next to him and kiss her again but...well, he was still kind of a mess from last night. Espen glanced down at his crumpled tunic and leathers and frowned thoughtfully. "I think I'm ready," he said and then shrugged. "Breakfast ready yet?" He actually had no idea what time it was.

It didn't matter how much he wanted to kiss her if she didn't want him back. Property or not, he had some boundaries. He had noticed she touched him a bit more...Gently? No, that wasn't the right word but almost. Maybe he was just reading what he wanted into everything. Eira didn't like being touched, he reminded himself. It was one thing for her to touch him, quite another the other way around.

He snorted and then winced and moaned at being pulled to a sit, all the blood rushing out of his head and making the throbbing headache more noticeable. "Storms, Eira," he swore a lot less playfully. He grit his teeth. "Give me a break," he grumbled. Of course this was not way to present himself, especially considering his own mother was an Elder as well. He wasn't afraid of disappointing her all that much because he he knew she respected him as a soldier. But this was different...this was proving he was his own adult, something he had failed to do with his children.

"Whoa whoa, future children?" That got him awake. His tone was more alarmed than anything. "Who said anything about that? Two more than enough!" He scrambled to explain and cover up any other feelings he had. Had he looked at Eira differently since they kissed? Of course. Had he possibly imagined having sex with her? Yes. But starting another family after his many colossal failures and outspoken desire to not have any more children despite the fact that he really really wanted Eira, a slave, to have those children? ...No. Certainty not. Probably.

Her rank didn't matter. To be honest, most men were surprised he hadn't taken her after she first bled. But he felt...obligated to protect her like a brother. At least before they kissed.

Espen brushed her hand away from his face gently. He had gotten in a playful brawl last night but thankfully none of those bruises were to his face. "Then you should have woken me half an hour ago, woman," he teased, more than motivated by the prospect of food to stretch and yawn and pull himself up. Were his clothes really not presentable? He wore these most of the time.

"Was celebratory drinking, I'll have you know," he grumbled. Not that it didn't cause pain on the wake up call but that hadn't been the point. If he never had to stop drinking and could feel that great all the time, he might.

Espen didn't discipline her much in private. But should she talk to him like this in public, he would. He had a rank and reputation to protect.

Awake and grumpier than ever after that comment. Partly because he was lying to himself and everyone else about how badly he wanted to have more with the right woman.

"Well, least you were doing something useful," he said. He did appreciate that something quite a bit more than it sounded. He watched her straighten his clothes still trying to wake up and pretend he didn't want her to touch him more. He stared down at her as she called him hopeless and if not for how demoralizing the teasing statement was, he might have kissed her. Why was she blushing like that? Strange.

He yawn again and ruffled his hair into some sort of near neatness and then Eira was leading him into the next room and toward the sunlight and he blinked and grumbled more.

"Papa!" Lise's delighted greeting was his only warning of the impending hug around his legs. He nearly stumbled and put a hand to Eira's shoulder to steady himself until he could see in the light. "Mornin' sunflower," he said gently, reaching down to pick her up. "Eira says you're a better shot that even yesterday?"

Like smiled at being picked up and buried her face in his neck for a moment before immediately wanting down. She was still quite infatuated with being close to people she cared about but also starting to be conscious of that reliance. She was very much independent and serious. Espen set her down and she pointed at her little toy bow on her shoulder. "I hit the target...four...three times," she puzzled out.

"You'll be hunting with me soon enough," he promised proudly.

If Lise had inherited one thing from Espen, it was his appetite. Even beyond how grumpy they could both be, she wasn't at all like him. Of course, it didn't help that now that her mother was gone, everything Lise did reminded him of her.

He hadn't intended to marry Astrid. But after Lise was born, he had thought it would be better than repeating the same mistake he had with Jesper's mother. But he'd been a bit too late for that. It was an emotional storm that he tried his best to avoid thinking about. Though he knew his brother could tell it bothered him, Espen wasn't the "talk about his feelings" sort. He would rather talk about anything and everything else.

He settled on the bench beside the small but finely crafted table. The hut might need more work, but the furniture was quite good. Rustic, simple, functional, sturdy. He dug into the food without another word, smiling at Lise's demand and patting the bench next to him for her to join him.

"Mouse? You call that terrifying warrior a mouse? She's a fox, at least," he teased. Espen scooped up most of the berries on his plate and dropped them into her bowl, tossing the rest in his mouth before digging into the rolls and meat.

Lise gave him a stern look, narrowing her eyes at him but she had wanted the fruit anyway, happy to munch away on second breakfast with her father.

"Did you eat, Eira?" He asked around a mouthful.

Also, speaking of foxes, his frost fox Is was around here somewhere. Familiar or not, the slender creature wasn't interested in most people. Neither did she care to be indoors. He could sense she was close, somewhere in the camp, likely hunting rats if he had to guess.

Espen didn't think about the dangers of what he did. Yes, it was dangerous but it was how their people survived. It was what he did, what his mother did, and her parents. Certainly there had been less raids and more great hunts following the herds but most of the land was gone now. It was why they were here, in this valley, squatting like carrion feeders. He didn't like it. Most hunters and warriors didn't. Hence why they had taken up a more active role in raiding towns and villages and farmsteads. The later didn't pose much of a fight with only farmers and soft women. But the former...there were militias and sometimes royal troops nowadays.

"That's my girl," he said proudly, pulling her into a shirt side hug. "You'll take down your first deer soon enough," he encouraged. Another year or two and he would take her with him on her first hunt.

Espen raised an eye brow at her like she was an idiot and a lot worse but he wasn't about to deal with that. If she didn't eat it was her problem and if she made herself sick, then it was his problem to get her better and he wouldn't be happy about it.

Lise turned to her father expectantly and Espen glanced at Eira. He hadn't thought about it. But...it would mean a lot to him for her to be there. "Maybe, sunflower. You, on the other hand, will stay here with Brenna. Not drinking until after your first successful hunt," he teased. But it was tradition. Hunting was a coming of age of sorts. It didn't mark adulthood, but it did show how one was growing and learning and coming into their own. 

He glanced back at Eira, not sure how to broach that topic directly.

Espen knew Eira worried. He didn't particularly enjoy putting her or anyone in such a state but there was nothing to be done about it. Likely the way he had found her didn't help matters.

"Good," he said. "Because I'm not going to catch you." It was as convincing a lie as her truth about not fainting. The slight upturn at the corners of his lips did suggest it was a joke, however. He was too busy finishing his own food to actually catch her point about the berries but even if he had, Espen probably wouldn't have understood she was trying to prove anything.

Lise picked up he bow from the door and the little quiver of dummy arrows and trotted out into the camp proper. Now that it was properly daylight hours, children were out playing, some of the young warriors were training, and it was almost time for the morning hunts to return. There had not been any raids the last night, as everyone was preparing for the feast after the ceremony. He imagined there would be quite a few afterward.

He shrugged. "Don't think it's that kind of ceremony," he chuckled. "But after...only with pretty women and maybe if I get drunk," he answered one after the other, though he wasn't sure he meant either. He stood and pulled on his cloak from a hook by the entrance. He'd have to find a way to get rid of his hangover first. Roan probably had an idea of some herbs that would help. He hesitated before stepping outside. "Everyone will be welcome at the feast, if you want to come," he added lamely. It wasn't a great invite but he wasn't sure she wanted a personal invite or just wanted to hang out with him like normal. Not that anything normal had happened last time.